


Toujours Fidele

by orphan_account



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/F, F/M, Hogwarts Sixth Year, M/M, Marauders' Era
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-13
Updated: 2018-11-12
Packaged: 2019-08-22 22:40:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16606763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: It's sixth year for the Marauders, and a lot has changed. Sirius ran away from home, something's up with Regulus, and Lily Evans is finally talking to James. Plus, what's going on with the Defense teacher? Follow the boys as they navigate new adventures and try to figure out what's going on this year at Hogwarts.





	1. Larmes D’ete (Summer Tears)

Sirius Orion Black hadn’t cried in a long time. Why he chose to start again now, he wasn’t quite sure. The summer had been awful, as far as summer breaks could go, but this was not the worst Sirius had endured. There was the summer after first year, when his family practically denounced him as their son after he got sorted into Gryffindor. He will never forget the whispers of “toujours pur” passing him in the hallways, always accompanied by a sneer. There was the summer after second year, when his mother and father thoroughly berated him for befriending the Potters, “those mudblood-lovers”. Third year, when his brother Regulus got sorted into Slytherin and his parents were overjoyed that they finally had a worthy heir. Fourth year, when his mother forcibly cut off all his hair because Sirius started to grow it out. Why should this summer be the one that broke him? A wave of anger surged through Sirius, and he hurled the nearest object, which happened to be a dinner plate, at the wall. Why is he letting them get to him now? Of course they would forbid him from speaking to Reg, he expected it the first summer he came back. But now it was official. Sirius could no longer see his brother. 

As if on cue, Regulus Black chose this moment to knock on Sirius’s open chamber door. Sirius took a second to wipe his face on the pillow, ashamed of his emotional indulgence, and looked up. 

“Reg! What the bloody hell are you doing here? Mother and father will kill us both if they see you!”

“I know, I’m sorry Sirius. I love you and, I, er, wanted to say goodbye because I know I won’t be seeing much of you anymore.” Regulus sniffled, his voice cracking near the end. Sometimes Sirius forgot how young his brother was, still barely a teenager, going into fourth year. Sirius got up to embrace the younger Black, both of them knowing that they can no longer indulge in such things anymore. Sirius closed his eyes, choosing to lose himself in the moment and rest his chin on Reg’s head while running a calloused hand through his short locks. Regulus simply gripped his older brother tightly, as if he was squeezing the life out of him. Sirius could feel the wet stains on his shirt that Reg’s tears were leaving, and he wished, for the billionth time, that Regulus would be spared from their parents wrath. 

“Regulus Arcturus Black, step away from that boy!” 

A voice boomed from down the hallway, belonging to none other than their mother Walburga Black. Fear creeped into Sirius’s stomach as he let go of his brother and stepped in front of him, arms extended as if to shield him. 

“I had a feeling I’d find you both together.”

Sirius swallowed, preparing himself for the worst.

“Sirius.” She sneered at him, removing her wand from the pocket of her nightgown. “You are a disease to the family. You should be thankful we even allow you return for the summer, and you repay us by corrupting our son? Our only worthy heir? Do you know how difficult it is for your father to deal with the public knowledge that his eldest son and supposed heir is a filthy, muggle loving Gryffindor?” 

Sirius stepped forward and, with all the courage his sixteen-year-old self could muster, declared, 

“I am not this family’s downfall. You have brought this on-” He was cut off by Walburga yelling,

“Expulso!”

Sirius was thrown back into a dresser, which splintered beneath him. A few glass shards from the decorational vases that were on top of the dresser sliced into his arms and face. He turned to look at Regulus and feverently whispered,

“Go, Reg! Get out of here! It’s not safe!”

Regulus glanced quickly between his hurt brother and enraged mother before giving Sirius a shaky nod and running down the left hallway. Sirius turned to face his mother, or rather the monster, that was marching angrily towards him. 

“You ungrateful piece of filth! You should be down on your knees thanking us for letting you stay here despite everything you’ve done. Go on, kneel! Beg for mercy and forgiveness like the snivelling brat that you are!”

Sirius spat the blood from his mouth at her feet and looked at Walburga with nothing but defiance in his eyes.

“I will never kneel for you,” he snarled

The words had barely left his mouth when his mother, eyes flaming with an intense anger the likes of which Sirius had never seen, raised her wand and chanted

“ You brought this upon yourself you selfish pig! Crucio!”

Sirius’s vision turned white, and the feeling of thousands of white hot needles pierced into his skin. He let out a blood-curdling scream and fell to his knees, writhing in pain. It was unbearable, and he clawed at his skin as an attempt to make it cease. The very air around him felt like it was burning and slicing into him, and he could not even feel the tears that had started to stream down his face in agony. For one long moment, all Sirius Black knew was pure, unrelenting torture. 

Then, the curse lifted and Sirius’s vision cleared. He took a moment to catch his breath before stumbling back into his own chambers, grabbing his wand and uttering the first curse that came to mind.

“Petrificus Totalus!”

Walburga had not been expecting Sirius to fight back, and the spell hit her square in the chest. Her body stiffened, unable to move. Sirius decided that the curse would buy him at least five minutes before his mother could nullify it, and rushed to pack his trunk. He shoved his robes and textbooks and anything else he could think of haphazardly into the chest, and then charmed it to be as light as a feather floating just above the ground for ease of transport. He hurried down the left corridor and turned towards the door, only to be stopped by Regulus, who had been hiding behind the stairs the whole time.

“Where are you going, Sirius?”

“I’m not sure yet, Reg, but you have to stay here. It’s not safe for you to be around me anymore. Mother and father will take care of you if I’m not around.”

The brothers shared one final embrace, clinging to each other tightly to make up for all that they were about to lose. 

“Please take me with you, Sirius?”

Sirius pulled away from the hug and looked at Regulus with tears brimming in his eyes. He pushed some of the messy black hair from his brother’s eyes so he could get one last clear glimpse of Regulus’s face.

“I’m sorry, Regulus. I didn’t mean to drag you into all this.” 

With that, he turned around and walked to the door, looking back only once to see his brother’s angry eyes staring up at him. Sirius’s heart broke, and he knew that even though he had no happy memories at 12 Grimmauld Place, a part of his soul would be left there, with Regulus.

Sirius ran down the street through the pouring midnight rain. His mind raced for ways that he could get out of here. Floo Powder was out of the question, he didn’t have a Portkey, and obviously he did not yet have his Apparating license. Maybe he could somehow attach his trunk to his broom? No, he didn’t know how to do that nor did he know where he could fly to. Suddenly, he remembered something his father talked about over breakfast one morning. He shakily raised his wand over the curb, as if he was hailing a cab.

A few moments passed. Sirius started to lose hope and wondered if he looked silly, standing out there in the pouring rain, but then, it appeared. A large purple triple-decker bus swerved around the corner and came to an abrupt halt in front of him. The Knight Bus, aptly named as it was, in fact, nighttime. He stepped into the Muggle-esque vehicle to be met with an old man who called himself Stan Shunpike

“Don’ you looka bit young t’be ridin’ so late at night, dontcha think?”

“I suppose I am” replied Sirius. 

“Well, what’s yer name, son?”

“Si-” Sirius stopped himself and decided it would be better if this man didn’t know that he was from a Pureblood family with ties to the Dark Lord. 

“Remus. Remus, uh, Lupin,” he said instead. 

“Ah, well, Mister Uh-Lupin, where’re ya headed?”

Sirius had to think about this for a minute. Where could he go? His best bet was probably to withdraw some money from Gringotts so he had something to last him through the year. 

“Diagon Alley, please.”

“That’ll cost ya eleven Sickles. Thirteen if ya want som’ hot chocolate, fifteen for a hot water bottle and a toothbrush in any color ya like.” 

Sirius went through his trunk for change. He had about five Galleons, a handful of Sickles, and a few Knuts strewn around. He gathered up eleven silver coins and handed them to Stan. 

“Alrighty then, lemme show ya to yer bed, Mister Uh-Lupin.”

“Actually, erm, it’s just Lupin”

“Oki then Mister Just-Lupin, right this way.”

Sirius sighed. 

Sirius followed Stan down the length of the bus, past rows and rows of mattresses until he stopped at one of the very last beds on the first floor of the vehicle. 

“Here she is, then! Don’ think twice bout’ givin’ a holler if ya need anything, alright Mister Just-Lupin?”

“That’s fine, thank you.”

Sirius looked around. Only five other beds were taken, and the occupants were all asleep. Understandably so, as it was probably about two in the morning. He sat down on the bed, finally allowing himself to catch his breath and truly process what he had done. Oh Merlin, what had he done? He just ran away from home! He left Regulus there, all alone, to deal with their parents! Where was he even supposed to go now? He could stay in a room at the Leaky Cauldron for a night or two, but he couldn’t afford to stay for very long. What was he supposed to do? Had he just made the worst mistake of his life? No, he told himself sternly. You did what you had to do and now you can finally be free of them. Suddenly, a thought struck him. He did have one option, but he felt a bit guilty asking other people for help. Somewhat shamefully, he started to write the letter.


	2. Maison de Collection (Collection House)

James Potter was very well aware of what kind of conditions his friends grew up under. Hell, when he first found out that Remus was barely allowed outside and that Sirius’s parents despised him, he had practically begged them to stay with him. Neither of them did, of course, for various reasons, pride being the main one. This summer, however, his house had become a collection point for all the lost and hungry souls of the world. Well, at least two. Remus had decided to stay there because he couldn’t do another full moon alone, and now Sirius just basically got fucking disowned. All he needed was Peter to need a place to stay and the Marauders would be reunited under his roof. As woeful and sad as that is, James was nonetheless proud that he was bestowed with the responsibility of taking care of his friends. A strange pride, really, but that kind of described exactly what James Potter was. Strangely prideful. 

When he heard the news about Sirius, James took a Portkey to Diagon Alley himself to pick him up. 

“James! You didn’t have to come all this way, I could’ve taken a broom, or the Knight Bus or-” Sirius was cut off by James leaping into his arms to give him a strong, brotherly hug. 

“Padfoot you sodding idiot, of course I’d come to pick you up! Wait, what happened to your face? Never mind that, mum’ll fix it up. She was worried about you, Sirius.”

“Did you tell her you were coming?”

“Erm, no, but-”

“Prongs! She’ll be worried out of her damn mind! Let’s hurry back before she finds out you’re missing.”

Sirius, as per usual, was right. They arrived at the Potter residence quickly enough, but James made Sirius walk in front of him so that his mother wouldn’t get too angry at him for disappearing so late without so much as a note. Sirius knocked on the door, and it opened to reveal a frazzled, visibly stressed Euphemia Potter

“James Fleamont Potter, where the devil have you been- Oh hello Sirius dear, how are you? Summer going well?”

“Mum, can Padfoot stay with us for the rest of the summer? His, er, his parents, well, they sort of, erm-” James motioned furiously with his hands. He did not want to say the words out loud, and Sirius was thankful that he didn’t. However, Mrs. Potter seemed to understand what her son meant, and quickly escorted the ex-heir of the Black family inside. Once Sirius stepped into the warm light of the Potters’ home, Euphemia gasped worriedly. 

“Oh goodness me, Sirius, what happened to your face and arms?” 

Sirius did not want to talk about how his mother had performed an Unforgivable Curse on him, so he decided to stretch the truth a bit.

“Mother, erm, threw a vase at me. I’m fine, though, it’s nothing much.”

“Nothing much? Oh dear, sit up on the counter, let’s patch you up.”

And as Sirius watched how Euphemia’s brow wrinkled as she searched for bandages, his eyes started to water a bit. This was what a family was supposed to be like. He knew he was probably never going to be part of a real family like Prongs was, but Sirius decided that this was close enough. The Potters and the Marauders were the only family he needed. And Regulus too, he supposed. Not that Regulus would be forgiving him anytime soon. He didn’t deserve to be forgiven, hell, he left his brother alone with his practically psychotic parents. God, would Regulus ever forgive him? Sirius missed his brother already. At least if Sirius wasn’t at home, then Reg didn’t have to see the violent side of his parents. Reg was smart, he knew how to avoid getting in trouble with them, which was something Sirius never learned. Sirius just hoped that he made the right decision for himself and for his brother. 

James knew exactly what Sirius was thinking about at that moment. Obviously, he did not bring it up, but he knew that something must have happened, something big, to make Sirius finally run away from home. Despite everything Lily Evans told him, there was more in his head than just air. He was smarter than most people gave him credit for. It probably something to do with his brother, he mused. James had met Regulus before, and the two had a lot in common, but they weren’t close friends or anything. James imagined he’d be seeing less and less of the younger Black. A shame really, James thought, as Regulus could’ve become a great Marauder. He certainly had the potential. He watched as his mother patched up his friend, cleaning up the various cuts and bruises caused by the supposed vase (James didn’t believe that lie for a second). James frowned whenever Sirius flinched. The two were like brothers, and despite James’ nonchalance, he was worried for his friends. Sure, Sirius was on his mind right now, but upstairs, Moony was recovering from the full moon two days ago. It wasn’t as bad this time, because he had Prongs with him, but last month resulted in a huge claw scratch across his face that just started to heal. 

Sirius was the one who finally broke the silence.

“How are things with Lily going, Prongs?” Sirius readied himself for the usual James Potter snarky comeback

“Actually, Pads, after what happened last year, I think I’ll just take my shot at being friends. I can understand why she hated me, I was a right arsehole.”

Sirius snorted.

“But anyway, I’ve decided to pull my head out of my arse and change a bit. For her. And if she wants to date Snivell- Severus, then I suppose that’s what she wants.”

Euphemia smiled at her son. She, of all people, had noticed how much James changed over the summer. She knew how he had pined for the pretty redhead girl since second year, and was glad that he was finally maturing. She finished wrapping the bandage around the deep gash in Sirius’s left bicep, and patted him on the shoulder. Sirius jumped off the counter and inquired,

“You said Remus was here? Where is he?” 

“Oh he’s probably upstairs, I’ll take you to him.”

James lead the long-haired boy up the rickety wooden stairs and down the long hallway. Sirius noted how much, well, homier the Potter house felt. More lived in. James stopped at the end of the hallway to reveal a modest bedchamber with two parallel twin cots on opposite sides of the room, an attached washroom (washroom was a generous word, it was just a closet with a loo and a sink), and a small balcony. Judging by the closed restroom door, it was occupied, most likely by Moony. 

“I was going to suggest a fun night involving Firewhiskey and maybe some Muggle party games, but I think you should get some rest.” James said, breaking the ever-returning silence. Then he added, in usual James Potter fashion “Plus, I wouldn’t be able to win fairly if you were both drunk and asleep.” 

Sirius scoffed. “Please, we all know you can barely hold your liquor, you lightweight.” Still, he set his bag down on the unoccupied cot and unpacked his pyjamas. 

Even though James was normally incredibly hyperactive, he retired to his bedroom first, leaving Sirius alone in the room. Alone, that is, until Remus stepped out from the washroom after brushing his teeth. 

“Wh- Sirius? What are you doing here?” 

“I’m staying with Prongs for the rest of the summer.” Maybe until he graduates, too, but Sirius didn’t add that. 

“You too, huh? Is it, is it that bad?”

“Yeah.” 

The two boys changed into night clothes and made their beds in a comfortable silence after that. Sirius could never put his hand on it, but he and Remus shared something special. Perhaps it was the mutual absence of love in their lives, or their ability to endure any pain, but it was something. Sure, James was like Sirius’s brother in that they were both loud, a bit arrogant, and a little pretentious, but Sirius and Remus were close in a different way. Sirius thought about this as he lay in bed, knowing that no matter what he did, the calming wave that was sleep would not wash over him anytime soon. After what felt like an hour (but was probably only twenty minutes; time feels different at three in the morning), Remus turned over and inquired,

“Can’t sleep either?”

Sirius shook his head.

The lanky lycanthrope (alliteration definitely intended, thought Sirius) got up and motioned at Sirius with his hand, indicating that he wanted the emotionally drained black haired boy to follow him out onto the balcony. Lupin then started to climb on the railing and up the brick wall (some of the bricks were partially pulled out, so one could place his feet on them). Sirius followed suit, and the boys found themselves on the roof of the Potter dwelling. Lupin dug out a mostly-full bottle of Firewhiskey that he had hidden behind a cinder block.

“Moony, have I ever mentioned what a bloody genius you are?”

“You could stand to mention it more often.”

Remus took a sip of the liquor and handed the bottle to his friend. They sat in silence, each watching the stars twinkle above them and thinking about how insignificant their problems were in the grand scheme of things, and passing the booze between them with increasingly fumbling hands. After a while, Remus pointed up at the sky.

“That’s you.”

“What?”

“That’s the constellation Canis Major. And that star’s called Sirius.”

Sirius looked at Remus and smiled. Of course Moony paid attention in Astronomy. He did too, he just forgot after the year-end exams. 

“Moony. C’mere.” Sirius said, making a grabbing motion with his hands.

“Why?”

“Wanna cuddle.” Sirius’s words were phrased as a statement, not a question. The whiskey had served its purpose in loosening the boy’s inhibitions. Still, Remus agrees and moves closer to Sirius, letting the other boy wrap his arms him. Remus winces slightly at the touch, and Sirius frowns. 

“Take off your shirt.”

“What? Pads, have you lost your bloody mind?”

“Just do it, you sod.”

Remus sighs in defeat. He had done his best to hide the other injuries from his last full-moon transformation (the most obvious one was slashed right across his fucking face, after all, as it nearly blinded him), but it seemed that Sirius had noticed again. Sirius always noticed. He slid the worn woolen blue jumper off, and turned so that his back faced Sirius. His pale skin was riddled with a plethora of cuts and scars. Some were long, some short, some were deep, some shallow, some were healed, some fresh. Sirius’s eyes scanned the marred skin in front of him. 

“Moony, why didn’t you say it was getting worse?”

“Didn’t want you to worry, Pads.” 

Sirius traced his finger over the ones that had healed. He frowned as he thought of how much pain they hid, and yet, how Remus was used to having new wounds added to the collection every month. He swallowed the lump forming in his throat

“Moony, I’m sorry. But you don’t have to do the full moons alone anymore, okay?”

“Okay. Thank you.” A moment passed. As an afterthought, Remus added, “Your turn. Take off your nightshirt.” 

Sirius did as he was told, and it was Remus’s turn to frown as he ran his hands over the boy’s back.

“Who did this?”

“Mother.”

Remus knew better than to press for more answers. Instead, he chose to say,

“The sun’ll rise in an hour or so. We should get as much sleep as we can manage.”

Sirius agreed. The two boys clambered back down the brick wall and onto the creaky wooden balcony. They might’ve lost some well-deserved sleep that night, but they gained something else. That same something that drew them together in the first place. And in the early light of the morning, Sirius finally put his finger on what that something was.

Understanding.


	3. Ensemble (Together)

Sirius and Remus only stayed with the Potters for two weeks, but it was by far the best summer they’d ever experienced. Time passed in a blur of Quidditch, Wizard’s chess, Exploding Snap, and Euphemia Potter’s homemade treacle tart. But soon enough, the expected supplies letter arrived from Hogwarts, and it was time for a trip to Diagon Alley. The boys had agreed to meet Peter there, as it had been months since the Marauders had a full reunion. The four of them met up at the Leaky Cauldron for snacks and drinks, and for an opportunity to complain about their N.E.W.T classes.   
“So, Remus, what’re you going to be taking?” Peter inquired. 

“Oh, I’m not too sure. Obviously Transfiguration, Charms, Defence Against the Dark Arts, Herbology, and all that, but I think I’m going to try my hand at a new elective this year.”

“Which one?”

“Sirius and I were thinking maybe Ghoul Studies?” 

“James and I were going for Advanced Arithmancy Studies.”

To some people, Peter’s answer may have been surprising. Standing squat at about 5’6, with all of his baby fat still hanging on to his face at age fifteen, he certainly did not look the smartest or the bravest. But Peter Pettigrew was an intelligent boy. He was the prime example of a Hatstall, because the Sorting Hat couldn’t decide if he was to become a Gryffindor or a Slytherin. Sure, he was sorted into the courageous House of the lion, but his Gryffindor loyalty was double sided. He remembered as if it were yesterday the day he met James Potter. It was in first year, and Peter had been spending his time with none other than Lucius Malfoy, biggest prat of their year. Peter had wanted to get on Malfoy’s good side, because, well, who dared to mess with the kid who’s daddy could probably buy out your house with his pocket change? Peter longed for that kind of respect and safety, and the closest he could get was through association. Malfoy, however, quickly grew tired of Peter’s lack of, well, finesse (but can you blame him? Peter once burned the toast because he was busy staring at a bird on the windowsill), and decided it was time to “dispose” of him. Dispose being a relative word, as they were both eleven and the worst Malfoy was going to do would be to kick him in the shins a couple of times, maybe. But as Peter Pettigrew cowered in the alcove, cornered by the domineering Slytherin, James happened to show up and socked Malfoy square in the jaw. Honestly, Peter doubted if James even knew what was going on, everybody at the school was looking for an excuse to punch Malfoy, after all, but nonetheless, Peter’s loyalties changed that day, and he’d followed James ever since. Self-preservation was in his blood, after all. Even the Sorting Hat could see that. 

The boys ordered another round of chips before parting into two groups to buy textbooks at Flourish and Blotts. James and Peter stuck together to find all the materials they needed for Arithmancy, and Sirius and Remus browsed for Ghoul Studies books (along with anything else that was ghost-related, as the topic had really started to interest the two). The Hogwarts teacher herself, Professor Lamia, had written volumes on the subject, including books about poltergeists (which Sirius decided to snag a copy of, in case it had any information on Hogwarts’ infamous poltergeist, Peeves), banshees, spirits, boggarts, dementors, and even horcruxes. They paged through the volumes even after James had mentioned that he and Peter were going to go check out the new broom models that had been released this week. Merlin, the subject was the most interesting thing that Hogwarts had to offer, Sirius thought. Why the hell didn’t more witches and wizards decide to take the class?

As if the heavens wanted to spite him, two other wizards he knew (but wished he didn’t) were walking towards the section Ghoul Studies. Sirius was pulled out of his book by Remus shaking his arm, and looked up to see a familiar, snobbish, silver-haired young man being trailed by a slouching boy with greasy black locks reaching his shoulders. 

“Malfoy. Snivellus.” Sirius spat, the latter name earning him a light punch in the arm from Remus, who added (in the politest voice he could muster given the people he was talking to),

“What, might I ask, are you doing here?”

“Getting our supplies for Ghoul Studies, is it not obvious? They don’t sell the edition that is taught at Hogwarts in Knockturn Alley.” Lucius replied. “Severus, go and retrieve two copies of the Ghoul Studies textbooks we are required to have this year.” His voice, although nasally (as was common in rich Pureblood families), was commanding and had a hint of a practiced elegance and regality that showed in his vocabulary. Sirius despised the sound of every syllable that Lucius uttered, and Remus agreed. 

Severus scurried to get the textbooks for his friend, although master seemed a more fitting title given the interaction the two just had. He passed Sirius and Remus as he walked back holding the books, stopping to sneer at the two

“Where’s your little ringmaster, huh? Off playing with his monkey?”

Sirius gritted his teeth. “Where’s your mother? Off crying she gave birth to one of Malfoy’s bloody house elves?”

Severus scowled. He opened his mouth to let another stinging retort fly when Lucius raised his hand to silence him. 

“I’d be asking where your mother is, Black. Imagine being the mother of a failure of an heir like you. I wonder what kind of shame it brings her when she has to to be seen with you. Come to think of it, I didn’t see you two together at the dinner party last week. In fact, I didn’t see you at all, Black. Did something,” Lucius paused for a moment, “happen between you two?”

The words hit Sirius squarely in his chest. His eyes flared, and he roughly moved Remus’s hand off of his shoulder, stood up sharply, and threw himself at the smirking grey-eyed boy before Remus could say anything. Sirius tackled Lucius, pushing him to the ground. Lucius, however, was expecting this kind of reaction from the hot-headed Gryffindor boy, and moved his bony leg up to knee Sirius sharply in the chest. The attack only stunned him for a second, but it was enough for Lucius to turn them over so he had the upper hand. Sirius, who had been in many fistfights and scuffles before, was familiar with the move and quickly slid out from under his attacker. As he was now the one standing up, Sirius took the opportunity to kick Lucius in the ribs twice, sending him sprawling. He then angrily picked Malfoy up by the collar, so his burning grey eyes met the other boy’s fearful ones. 

“Don’t you ever speak of my family again.” Sirius hissed, and cuffed him in the jaw. 

At this point, Remus had collected himself enough to get up and put his arm firmly on Sirius’s shoulder, guiding them out of the aisle. Sirius was breathing heavily, his face was red with anger and fatigue. They had just turned his back to Malfoy when he spit out a final remark.

“They’re not really your family anymore now, are they?”

Unlike his previous words, this sentence turned Sirius’s face visibly paler and sent his hands shaking. Remus’s ever present guiding hand led them out of the bookstore (after paying for the books, of course) before any more fighting could break out. Sirius shivered. It felt like the world had gotten ten degrees cooler, but he was still sweating. His vision blurred at the edges, and white noise filled his ears. What the hell was happening? Remus saw his friend shaking, and pulled him into the small alleyway between the bookstore and another shop. Sirius collapsed to the ground, eyes darting wildly as if he was worried someone was following them He hugged his knees to his chest as his breathing became sporadic.

“F-fuck Moony, how did, how did bloody M-Malfoy know?” he stammered. “Does- does that mean, oh fuck, it means that Bella and Narcissa know and oh fucking hell, Moony, it means that e-everyone, everyone knows! Uncle Cygnus, a-and Aunt Druella, and oh my fucking lord Uncle Alph, he can’t know he’ll, he’ll try to help or do something stupid, and oh shit Moony, Uncle Alph can’t know. He can’t know. He can’t. He-” Sirius was starting to hyperventilating at this point, and Remus draped his cloak over the other boy in an attempt to calm him down, but Remus was scared too. He knew what the Black family was like.

“Why can’t your Uncle Alphard know? I mean, if he’s going to help, why not accept it? You need all the help you can-”

Remus was cut off by Sirius looking up at him with genuine terror in his eyes, something that he had never seen before. 

“They could kill him.”


	4. Entraîneur Événements (Train Car Conversations)

The fated day had arrived: the boys were finally headed off to Hogwarts. As per usual, they boarded the Hogwarts Express fashionably lately thanks to Sirius (“We’ve got to make a statement, James!”), and they took their places in their compartment located on the back end of the train. They took turns running their fingers down the carvings of their initials in the wall that had been the result of a Firewhiskey-fueled ride back home during fifth year. Two very different things happened immediately afterwards, however. The first being that Lily Evans and her friends sat down in the compartment adjacent to the Marauders. The second, perhaps even more surprising, was that Lucius Malfoy, Severus Snape, and Medwick Nott took their places in the booth behind the girls. 

Sirius, Remus, and Peter sighed to themselves as they watched James rise, run a hand through his hair, and swaggered across the aisle (or attempted to) to Lily Evans. 

“Didn’t he swear off of the ridiculous flirting with Lily?” Sirius inquired.

“Yeah, but he’s James, mate. Did we really believe him?” replied Peter, with Remus nodding in agreement. 

The three boys watched a rather curious incident unfold before them.

James leaned up against the door of the compartment as seductively as his sixteen-year-old self could manage (which wasn’t half bad, surprisingly, although Lily would rather be caught dead than admit it). He cleared his throat and began speaking

“What’s up, Evans?” he asked, with a hint of the usual flirtation in his voice.

Mary MacDonald and the blonde Slytherin girl (was her name Narcissa? James only knew her vaguely from Potions last year) giggled into their sleeves, while the fourth girl, Marlene McKinnon, sighed and rolled her eyes in a similar manner as Lily. Before Lily could open her mouth and offer back a sarcastic response, someone was already putting words in her mouth for her.

“Salazar, Potter, do you ever shut up? Can’t you see she isn’t interested?”

The voice came from none other than the greasy black haired boy in the compartment behind. Severus had already stepped out of his coach, arms crossed and chin pointed up, and with Malfoy and Nott standing leisurely behind him.

James swallowed stiffly, replying with all the composure he could assemble against his rival. 

“Hello, Snape, How have you been?” 

“Foolishly avoiding the question, as usual, Potter,” Severus continued, grinning unsettlingly. “Didn’t I make myself clear? Leave her be.”   
James knew he had to remain calm, to not show any of his former animosity towards the Slytherin. For Merlin’s sake, he was James Fleamont Potter, not some fourteen-year-old bullying toerag like Lily always used to call him! He had to be mature, if not for Lily, then for his own moral reasons at this point. James didn’t regret many of his actions in his life, but the way he treated Severus was definitely at the top of his list. After Lily had pointed it out in fifth year, he realized what kind of an utter arse he had been; it made bile rise in his throat when he thought about it. Although pride stopped him from formally apologizing, he had been trying his best thereafter to be at least cordial to Snape and his fellow Slytherins. 

This time, however, he didn’t have to be. Lily rose up angrily from where she was sitting and replied in James’s stead.

“Here’s a better question for you, Severus: why don’t you leave me be?”

This clearly was not the reaction that Snape had been hoping for. Conflict flashed across his eyes; it was clear that he wanted to goad James into rage, not Lily. Glancing back at Malfoy, who was studying his fingernails in a bored manner, Snape made the decision to keep going.

“Just wanted the best for you, Lily.”

“I’m sure you did, you know. Especially when you and Malfoy shoved those first-year muggleborns into the muddy Quidditch pitch after it rained, and when you had that fourth-year pureblood girl do your Transfiguration work for you or else you would tell her mum about the half blood girl she was dating, or when you decided to drag through the dirt the names of all the muggleborns in this school, which by the way, includes me, did you kno-” She was abruptly cut off by Snape’s yelling.

“You know I didn’t mean you! You’re different, Lily, I swear, you always were!”

“That’s fucking disgusting, Severus. I’m no different than any other muggleborn at this school and you know it! You bloody well know it, you creep!” 

“No I didn’t Lily, I take it back, please-” 

This time, it was James doing the interrupting.

“Snape, please, calm down-”

“No you calm down, you stupid, inarticulate cockroach! What do you know about Lily, huh? I’ve known here since we were nine, I think I know what’s best for her!” 

Lily was fuming. Even James thought it wise to step away from her as she stormed towards the now-fearful Slytherin.   
“Get out of my sight you bigoted, classist, greasy bastard. I don’t want to so much as see you for the rest of my life.” She punctuated her statement with a sharp slap to Snape’s face and walked away without so much as a look back. 

Severus tried to reach out, words of apology hanging on his lips, but was dragged back by Malfoy and Nott, both muttering ashamedly; whispers of “don’t embarrass yourself further, Snape” and “you just got your arse handed to you, Severus” waltzed past his ears. James almost felt sorry for the boy. Almost, but the interaction still left a bad taste in his mouth. 

He raced to catch up with Lily, who had yet to cool off. He reached out to grab her shoulder, and she turned swiftly around with anger from the previous interaction still lingering in her eyes. 

“You- god, James, don’t think I’ve gone and forgiven you just yet.” she began.

James closed his mouth, which he hadn’t even realized was open. Lily noticed the startled expression in the boy’s eyes and softened her voice.

“But I am glad that you’re trying to change, okay? It’s a start, and that’s more than I can say for-” Her voice was broken off when she fell into James’s chest and wrapped her arms around him.

If James was startled five seconds ago, he wouldn’t know how to describe the feeling in his stomach right now. After the initial shock, he returned the hug and rested his chin on her head, stroking the back of her hair.

“I’m sorry- I just… need this right now. It hurt to say those things, you know? But I know I did the right thing. I hope.” 

James didn’t think he could articulate a response, but thankfully, he didn’t have to. The pair stood in the hallway for a handful of minutes before awkwardly walking back to their respective compartments. And, when James opened the door for Lily this time, she graciously accepted it. 

Meanwhile, Sirius had been dragged away by his cousin Narcissa shortly after the encounter between Snape and James concluded. She had taken him sharply by the arm and the two Blacks walked to the back of the train, getting a couple looks from the other passengers as they passed. She turned to him frantically and began talking, keeping her voice hushed as to not alert any other Hogwarts students. 

“I know what happened during the summer.” 

“I figured you would.” If Lucius knew, then Narcissa definitely did. She was infinitely more intelligent than him anyway. 

“You fucked up pretty badly, Sirius.”

“I know.” 

“Have you spoken to Regulus yet?” 

“No.”

Narcissa’s expression made Sirius realize what a mistake that was. He should’ve at least owled his brother, instead of leaving him alone to deal with the aftermath of his actions. Narcissa must’ve noticed his sullen face because she spoke again.

“That was stupid, but brave.”

“Thanks. I think.”

“What made you do it?” 

Sirius paused for a moment. He hadn’t told anyone what really happened that night; he barely thought about it since he arrived at James’s house. Besides being (to put it lightly), an emotionally grueling story, that kind of information being passed around the Black family would be potentially dangerous. He decided to play a game instead. 

“Secret for a secret.”

The game started with Andromeda, when they were kids at one of the joint family dinners. Over the years, it became a sort of inside joke among the black sheep of the Black family. (That was a good pun. Sirius planned on writing that down, maybe even making the three of them matching t-shirts with the phrase on it). 

Narcissa sighed. Sirius could tell she was weighing her options silently, true to her Slytherin nature, but knew that he had already won. Naturally, Narcissa’s curiosity won out.

“I’m getting engaged next summer.”

This caught Sirius completely off guard. He knew that it had to happen eventually, but didn’t think it would be so soon. Bellatrix got married at least a year after she left school, and Andromeda married right after seventh year (and was subsequently burned off of the tapestry). 

“Oh, Narcissa, please don’t say this is because of me- god, I’ll go back, you shouldn’t have to marry some rich pureblood bastard just because-” 

“Sod off, Sirius, it’s not because of you. And it’s not some pureblood bastard, it’s Lucius.”

Sirius’s jaw dropped. That was something he hadn’t seen coming. He’d have to watch one of his only remaining cousins that still liked him be married off to the literal worst person in this school. He opened his mouth to yell, to protest, to scream at the bloody unfairness of it all, but Narcissa raised her finger to silence him. 

“Stop it, it’s not because of you, and there’s nothing you can do, so shut it. After Andromeda left, and since uncle Alphard never married, mother decided that the Black family needed more connections, or some other bullshit like that. So I’m marrying Lucius.” 

“You could always leave too, you know.”

“Oh cousin, dear,” Narcissa began, almost condescendingly, “Some of us know how to play the long game. In the meantime, though, I’ll need a favour.” 

“Anything.” Although it wasn’t technically his fault, Sirius couldn’t help but feel a bit guilty. 

“Lucius isn’t, well, he’s uh- he’s not exactly my type.”

Sirius snorted. 

“No no no, you’re missing my point.” She shifted her gaze downwards, playing with her fingers. “Blokes aren’t really my type.”

The realization finally smacked Sirius in the face. In all honesty, it wasn’t like he hadn’t seen this coming; all of the metaphorical Black sheep (Sirius loved that pun) had their own differences. It wasn’t the most surprising thing he’d heard from her today, by any means. 

“Okay, what do you want me to do about it?”

“Could you, uh, maybe talk to Marlene for me? You’ve known her longer than me, and you dated her in fourth year.”

Sirius wrinkled his nose at the memory of his relationship with Marlene Mckinnon. It was fun, he supposed. But it didn’t last long. None of them ever did. Something was always off, he supposed. But that was besides the point. 

“Yeah, okay. I can do that.” 

The third train car conversation occurred just after Narcissa and Sirius walked off. Marlene and Mary sat down opposite to Peter and a bit too close to Remus for his liking. Not that he didn’t like the girls or anything; he just liked his personal space a bit more. The boys sat uncharacteristically quietly and hoped that Mary and Marlene wouldn’t start something as intense as the fight they just witnessed. However, there was no such thing as a break for them. Mary was the first to speak up.

“Alright, now that those two idiots are gone, we can finally get some work done. No offense to James and Sirius, but you lot are far more mature than them.”

Remus noticed a blush creep up Peter’s neck at the compliment and raised his eyebrow quizzically. He’d have to ask about that later. For now, he let Marlene continue the conversation.

“Have you heard who the new Defense professor is?” After a curt shake of the head from the two boys, she resumed. “It’s some bloke called Professor Bratum.”

“-Now I know what you’re thinking: why do we care?” Mary interrupted. “Well, Lena (Remus assumed that Lena was Marlene’s nickname) and I did a little digging around my father’s documents and such, and he’s got his own file on him.” She looked over to her friend, nodding at her to go on. 

“What’s in the file, you ask? Well, Professor Adam Bratum has gone through more jobs than Hogwarts has DADA professors.”

Remus pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. “Look, Marlene, I understand that that’s a tad sketchy, but there could be a million explanations for why someone changes jobs so often.” Heaven knows he would have to do the same after he left Hogwarts, given the fact that he was a werewolf. 

“Yeah, do you have any actual proof that this bloke is dark or something?” Peter added. 

“Getting to that,” Mary replied. “There’s no information on his family or parentage either. The only other bit in the file is his address, but when we looked it up, the house actually belongs to the Lamia family, currently inhabited by the sole heiress, Eleni.” 

“Okay so-” Peter began to break in, but Marlene shushed him and continued. 

“Here’s the important part: his file isn’t under the Wizard Registration like the rest of us. He’s registered under the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures as a being.” 

“Alright, Marlene, I agree that that’s shady, but you do know that witches and wizards count as beings, right? Plus, if you work in that department for the Ministry, that’s what you get registered as.” Peter said after a pause. 

“Yeah, well, he’s never worked a Ministry job in his life. Plus, he’s classified as a triple-x threat, so even if he was a wizard, he’s rank no more than a double.” Mary responded. 

“Why would Dumbledore hire someone who’s categorized as a triple-x?” Remus raised after being silent all this time.

“No clue. That’s why we told you lot.” Mary confessed. 

“Correct me if I’m wrong, Peter, but didn’t all wizards get classified as beings in the Magical Creatures department a long time ago?” Remus wracked his brain for something he thought he heard Professor Binns talk about once. “What if the bloke’s just really old?” 

“Yeah, before 1873.” supplied Peter. 

Marlene fumbled in her robe pockets before pulling out a crumpled photograph (along with several chocolate frog cards). 

“This is him.”

The photo was taken mugshot-style, unlike most resume photos. As for the man in the picture himself, well, he couldn’t have been more than twenty-two. He had a regal but gaunt face, as if he hadn’t eaten in weeks. Pale white skin stretched tightly over his bones, broken only by the occasional scar on his neck and face. A mop of silky black hair topped his head, dipping just below his chin. One thing was for certain, though. The man looked unquestionably like a student that they knew all too well: Severus Snape.


End file.
